Never be afraid to search privately.
There is nothing to be afraid of in searching privately. Someone should be able to wonder or be curious about things without announcing them to the world. You should be able to look into something strange at two in the morning, or something foolish, or something you do not yet understand.
Curiosity is not a confession. A question is not a crime. What you search for in the quiet of your own head space belongs to you. Keep your mind's door shut. Ask the question. Find out what you need to know. Then go and make the coffee. Put your feet up.
.png)